13 Jim Hutchinson Two Tomorrows The Happy Fox & Lady Belinda

Lady Belinda The Happy Fox Page List

 

The Happy Fox page 16

Mr Bloody 

Lady Thelma decided it would good for the Sholtren Hotel and a boost to local moral to invite the media circus to the village hall to hear Tandy announce the Strasbourg Court had fixed a date to hear his case to classify foxhunting with pheasant shooting as 'a traditional sport.' Tandy's announcement, made at 7 pm Friday, made all the front pages the following morning. The Mail welcomed the coming EU court case with the headline. Common Sense At Last. 
The Guardian asked. Horse Ripping: Legal Next Year? Under the headline Mr Bloody. The Mirror had a full page colour photo of the smiling Churchillian Brigadier Tandy in full dress uniform.  'Who would have thought,' the Mirror asked, 'this nice man attending his daughters wedding could be so bloody cruel?'  Tandy and what the Sun called; Bloody EU Diktat You Will Obey became top-story. The BBC invited Tandy to appear on Andrew Marr's Sunday show. Tandy arrived wearing his thirty-year-old Rupert suit. His daughter had insisted he wore it because it made him 'look cuddly.'

After introducing Tandy, Marr reminded viewers of the increasingly confusing Europeon debate adding 'Winston Churchill is on the record as saying.' “Given the choice of taking Britain into a European Government and going to hell. I would rather go to hell.”  Turning to Tandy he asked. 'But seriously Brigadier. Don't you think you are undermining the authority of Parliament?'  Looking at Marr as if he had just noticed an imbecile in the room, Tandy asked. 'How could anyone undermine a Parliament the Queen sold down the river in 1972?' Tandy's steel grey eyes froze whatever reply Marr started to make. Tandy ploughed on. 'The Queen signed away Parliament's right to decide these matters years ago. Had you taken the time to read the European treaties you would not be asking such a bloody stupid question.'  Marr's mouth was open. But the Brigadier went booming on. 'In 1972. Acting for the Queen the late Tory leader Edward Heath began handing over the power to govern Britain to foreign bankers. The European Single Act, which the Queen signed in 1986, handed over complete control to a single bank run by foreigners! Under the new EU Constitution also called the Lisbon Treaty, British pension funds will shortly be transferred to Frankfurt. British pension rights will cease to exist! I intend to tell the British public the truth about the EU agenda. People like you, Mr Marr, are far too rich to care what happens to Britain. I represent the people who do care. A Referendum on leaving Europe is long overdue. And I, intend to call that Referendum.'  
At that point the screen went blank. In a cold sweat royal apologist Marr had ended the interview with a coded signal to the producer. Tandy had left the studio before the 'technical fault' was found.
Tandy's refreshing honesty played well with most news's editors watching the program. Unlike Marr, they did care about Britain. Most, like Tandy, were heartily sick of the Queen's handiwork. Tandy allowed Alan Rusbridger to talk him into a Sunday evening press conference followed by dinner at the media's expense. Seasoned journalists were not surprised to meet Earl Sholtren and Lady Thelma on the steps of Grosvenor House, handing out Tandy's brief statement admitting he was using the foxhunting debate to ask.  'Who Rules Britain?' The press conference led to Monday's newspaper's. Naughtie, Humphrys, Snow, Paxman & Co. Asking the same question posed by the Den website. As Jon Snow put it. 'In these days of home-grown suicide bombers. Do we need a nuclear-vested Head Of State who keeps her billions in foreign banks? Or a hole in the head?'     

Tuesday's editorials could find no case for operating nuclear power stations. No case for staying in the EU, no case for paying the Civil List but mountains of evidence to end the phony monarchy.

On Tuesday night Tandy appeared on Newsnight.

Kirsty Wark cut to the chase. 'If all what you say is true Brigadier. Why on earth did so many MP's vote to join Europe in the first place?' 

Tandy smiled like Father Christmas with a child on his knee. 'To answer that question young lady I will require one minute. Without interruption.'

Kirsty smiled back. 'Be my guest Brigadier.' Tandy beamed into camera.

'First of all let me remind viewers. In the 1960's Britain's' richest landowners decided to join their landowning cousins in Europe. One of the obvious attractions was Europe's vast pool of agricultural subsidies. Taken from taxpayers for growing whatever the landowners club decide. The late Tory MP Mr Edward Heath became the British landowner's spokesman. Leading academics opposed the whole idea of joining Europe. They pointed out the absurdity of paying for a needless European Parliament that would overrule British Acts of Parliament. Economists proved Heaths' promises of increased trade were complete and utter nonsense. Our trade with Europe has doubled naturally every twenty years since the end of the Napoleonic Wars. Heath's plan to surcharge British taxpayers billions of pounds per year, for totally needless trade agreements, was premeditated Grand Larceny from the very start. Every single year. Four billion pounds, which should go to schools and hospitals, now go's to Brussels to pay for Heath's criminal Common Agriculture Policy. One billion. Completely disappears in fraudulent EU administration. Three billion, returns in criminally contrived subsidizes. Eighty percent of these fraudulent subsidizes, including the so-called Thatcher Rebate, go straight into the pockets of the largest landowners, the Queen's Establishment. Every minute of the day the British public are being robbed by criminal contracts binding our food supply to a rigged market no honest Head Of State would have considered joining. From the start of her reign the Queen has expected a nuclear accident or attack that would make Great Britain unfit for human habitation. Her entire reign has been spent increasing the royals offshore fortune. You will have noticed the Queen has done nothing for her subjects. British MP's who speak in favour of the landowners price-fixing club called the Europe Union are working for the royal family whose sole interest in life is looting the British Treasury.'
Tandy had brought two document folders the size of telephone directories. Picking them up from the desk, holding one in each of his huge hands. He continued. 'This evidence clearly shows the Queen and her puppet's have betrayed this country for long enough. I will prove, a Parliament that votes to stay in the EU is nothing more than a common thieves kitchen.'    

Kirsty Wark did not interrupt. Unlike the unctuous Andrew Marr, Kirsty thought it was high time the public were told of the royals hidden agenda. She ended the program by telling viewers. 'A few minutes ago we had a report from Lydd Airport in Kent. Apparently. Earlier this evening. John Major flew from Lydd to Zurich in a private jet. Lydd Airport tell us Mr Major chartered the plane at five o/clock this afternoon. At two o/clock this afternoon we asked Mr Major to discuss the infamous Maastricht Treaty with Brigadier Tandy on Newsnight. Mr Major told Newsnight he was ill in bed with the flu.

 ____

Rainy Day Islands

The next morning Tandy's outsized smile appeared on the front page of most European and USA newspapers. Tandy's local radio station Norfolk FM decided to stage a day-long phone-in asking. 'Should we leave the EU?'Most people were far more concerned with the floods. One irate housewife called to say.  'I'm paddling knee-deep in the kitchen. If I had my way I'd use all those smarmy fat-cat  Europhiles as bloody sandbags.'

The presenter changed the question. 'Where would you hide if you were John Major?'

One caller suggested. 'Area 51 seems about right. That's where he came from. Innit?' 

An elderly lady who claimed to have met Major, expressed the opinion. 'Great Britain would be far better-orf if Mr Major had disappeared before his Maastricht Treaty sold this country to the money changers.'

On Radio 4, John Humphrys spoke to ex spy, David Shayler. 

'I believe you worked for Brigadier Tandy. In the Major years?'

 'No. I had to attend his briefings. That's how I know him.'

 'Tandy is described as a Palace aide. What exactly would that entail?' 

 'Security. He was one of many high-ranking officers responsible for security arrangements for the royals. Tandy was in charge of vetting all foreign guests. Which meant supervising the kind of bugging Claire Short revealed at the UN.'

'How come he seems to know so much about the EU?'

 'Well. To do his job you would need to know the law inside-out. Not just in Europe but in every country where the royals go.'    

 'And what do you think about his allegations of EU corruption?'

 'They sound more like facts to me. Not allegations. Tandy wasn't the only intelligence officer against our food supply policy coming from the back street's of Brussels.'

 'Do you think he was involved with IDS and John Redwood. When they riled against John Major's support of the Maastricht Treaty.'

 'Good God no. A man of Brigadier Tandy's calibre has nothing to do with half-wits. IDS and Redwood haven't got a clue what go's on in this country let alone in Europe.'

 'Would you say Tandy is working alone then?'

'No. I'd say he would prefer to make it look that way.' 

'Do you think he is involved with any political party?'

 'Well I can say there seems to be a military structure behind the UK Independent Party. I can not say Brigadier Tandy is part of it.' 

 'Were you surprised to hear John Major had left the country?'

 'Not at all. I expect Thatcher to follow suit. It's important to mention Tandy's security clearance was way above that of any mere Prime Minister. If Tandy wants a Referendum on the EU. You can be sure his evidence will force Parliament into calling one.'  

 'And what would his Referendum prove?'

 'It seems to me Tandy will prove the Queen agreed to merge with Europe in the early 1960's. Joining the Common Market was her contribution to the New World Order. Forecast by her chief advisor. Sir Anthony Blunt.'

 'Blunt was a relative of the Queen. Was he not?'

'Yes. He was a bastard son of her grandfather. George the fifth liked to play three-in-a-bed. Blunt came out of Queen Mary's best friend. But that's beside the point. Blunt's significance was his knowledge of the money markets. Few could hold a candle to Blunt when it came to the bottom line of politics. That's why the Queen Mum and then the present Queen kept him on a short leash.'

 'And what about Blunt's friends, Philby, Burgess and McLean?'

 Well they never advised the royals directly. But like Blunt, they saw the New World Order as inevitable. Or to put it bluntly. No pun intended. They saw human nature as unchangeable. The rich will always stick together to keep the majority uneducated. Keeping the peasants fighting amongst themselves is the name of the royal game. All that idealistic drivel attributed to Blunt and the Cambridge Apostles was never true. On the contrary they became convinced they could not influence events. They said so in a dozen reports concerning the Manhattan Project. Blunt was the first British academic to state the richest of the rich would jump on the nuclear-gravy-train. Brigadier Tandy is the opposite of Blunt. He believes he can stop the Fourth Reich, as he sees it.'

 'And do you think he can? Take Britain out of Europe. That is?'

 'Yes. I think a Referendum will bring out the British Bulldog in all of us.'

'And the future of the monarchy. What about that?'

'Well. If Tandy exposed the Queen's nuclear waste profits the royal family would end-up against the wall like their cousins the Romanov's and the Ceaucescu's.'

 'You believe Tandy's evidence is that strong?'  

'I do. I also think the Queen will delay his Referendum by stepping down and declaring it's time for a Republic.'

'What? You mean, just to stop Tandy using his evidence?'

 'No. The Queen can't hide the truth this time. But stepping down will buy time and allow the royals to disappear before all the evidence comes out. At the moment Tandy is giving them every escape route. And. As you people in the media are finally reporting. The royals have always been ready to abandon Britain at a moments notice. Not one single member of the royal family could care less what happens to this country. When you live in obscene luxury, surrounded by armed guards and a creepfest of grovelling servants. It really doesn't matter what part of the planet you happen to be shooting dumb animals. Do's it?'

'Uhmm. That's true. Where do you think the royals will head to?'

' That's anyone's guess. The family began acquiring what Blunt called rainy day islands weeks after the Soviet Union exploded their first atomic bomb in 1949. At the height of the Cold War there was much talk about Prince Edward Island, in the Indian Ocean. But many thought that was just a bluff. It's more likely they will disappear altogether. Nobody really knows how many islands they own in the Pacific. We are talking about truly obscene wealth here. The world really is their oyster.'

'And what do you think of the allegation that two of the Queen's children's were not her husbands?'

'Well I think history will record adultery as the least of  Queen Lizzy's sins. It is the organized theft of public money that will shock people. Hospitals, schools and transport could be running for half the present price were it not for the Queens energy cartel. As head of state the Queen has robbed Britain of cheap energy and the dirt cheap public services that come with it. She did this for no other reason than increasing her family's personal profits from their multi-billion oil and nuclear investments. If Tandy gives the media the true extent of crown controlled corruption any revelations of Phil and Liz's clutch of pathetic bastards will pale into insignificance.'

'So your saying the adultery allegation is true then? '

'Oh it's true. But if the Queen were brought to trial she would be charged with looting the British Treasury for the last sixty years. Not for screwing her pathetic, fawning palace servants.'

Humphrys then spoke to a BBC financial reporter based in Zurich.

'Do we know where John Major is now?'     

'Well. We do know his plane landed here at nine local time last night. But as you know John. The Swiss authorities never answer questions. I've been speaking to off-duty aircrew, an Irish stewardess tells me it's quite possible Major only came here to board another small jet. I live near the airport and I can confirm there is a constant stream of private flights until midnight six night a week.'

 'So you think Major has left Zurich?'

'That could well be John. He could be well on his way to Ronnie Biggs old hacienda in Rio, for all I know.'

 ____

Buckingham Palace

The Queen was watching the second half of Channel 4, 7 pm News showing a Fox TV reporter outside Brooklyn courthouse. The reporter told viewer's. 'Levin say's he will sue the British Crown for ordering his false arrest and false imprisonment. For the time being the truckloads of missing diamonds will remain a royal mystery. This network is preparing an exclusive program in which we hope to reveal their whereabouts.'

Having hacked into the Jewel Rooms. It had taken Levin six more months to find a back door into one of the Swiss vaults. He hit the jackpot. And the jackpot scared him. Tanya agreed it was far too dangerous to transmit any details over the net. They tossed a coin to determine who went to Oxford. Fortunately for Tanya she lost the toss. Levin rang Neville to say he would be paying a call. Unfortunately for Levin, Her Majesty's
Secret Service had traced one of his hacks into the Jewel Rooms to Levin's software company. The Republican Professor Neville had been under occasional post & phone surveillance for years. Kafka Castle's computer's put 2 & 2  together. Levin was as good as arrested the moment he booked his flight to Stanstead. Neither his confinement in British jails, his deportment to America or his alleged hack into Citibank, had been reported in the British media. Only after his trial in New York did the British media report what Fox TV were calling 'The Royal Hacker.' Judge Simmons had dismissed the case after the prosecutions principle witness folded under cross-examination. Defence lawyer Mitchell produced two witness's who claimed the man was in New York when he claimed to be in St. Petersburg with Levin, hacking into Citibank.
As the News ended. A Page of the Presence entered with an urgent message. Lizzy read the short note from the BBC. Then ordered the lackey to change channels.  

Panorama: Your Bill Ma'am

The program came as a complete surprise. Viewers were expecting a "celeb" edition of University Challenge. Speaking outside Buckingham Palace chief reporter Jane Corbin told viewers. 'Panorama has decided to disregard a Palace Injunction to stop this program going out. In 1992 Panorama and Guardian reporters began investigating the royals undeclared fortune. We now have evidence showing the Queen's off-shore fortune earns over four-million-pounds every twenty-four-hours. In interest alone. Other members of the family have similar undeclared income. Since last June the Palace have persistently refused to discuss this subject with Panorama and the Guardian newspaper.

 Showing footage of a royal shooting party, all Arabs, arriving at Balmoral earlier that day, surrounded by British armed police. Corbin continued.

'The latest figured released by Her Majesty's
Treasury show that protecting the monarchy for the year 2003 cost the taxpayer over £1.9 bn. On top of the annual £M7.9 Civil List. The same year, 2003, the round the clock watch on full-time foxhunter Camilla Parker Bowles cost the taxpayer, an extra £M3.4. In June 2003 the Palace announced the Queen had saved the nation £M4 on her annual travel expenses. This meant she had spent £M4 less public money travelling between seven palaces than she spent in 2002. Panorama can find no record of the Queen telling anyone of the  £M30, she took from the nation by illegal tax avoidance prior to 1992. Panorama will be asking when the Queen is going to return the £M30 she owes the nation.' 

Showing old footage of the Queen in Grand Cayman knighting the man she put in charge of Cayman Islands banking. Corbin told viewers. 'This program will also reveal some, but by no means all, of the royal family's Caribbean, American, Canadian, Africa, and Australian landholdings. Panorama will be asking why this family of multi-billionaires can't find the common courtesy to pay their own bills?' 

Showing footage of MP's swearing their allegiance to the Queen in Parliament, Corbin went on. 'It was not just Simon Hughes Private Members Bill of 1992 that made the Queen pay tax. It was the author Philip Hall. At the Public Records Office. Phillip Hall had been given a document by mistake. The document was marked Top Secret until 2060. The document proved the Queen had illegally decreed she would not pay tax. Before publishing his book Royal Fortune, Philip Hall warned the Palace of it's contents. Ten minutes ago Panorama delivered a similar warning to the Palace. Some of our evidence shows how the royals off-shore fortune stems in part from monies stolen from the annual Civil List. The Civil List was first set at £600,000 per-year over 300 years ago. Panorama will also reveal some of the billions the Queen's forefathers made from the slave trade, the arms trade, opium, tea, cotton, railways and shipping. Tomorrow the Guardian will publish a letter signed by 300 members of Parliament asking the Queen to announce she no longer needs the Civil List. In the same letter the 300 MP's, are demanding the Queen pays back the £M30 tax she owes, with the £300 million interest that money has now earned.'

In a forty minute program, taking viewers around the globe Panorama estimated the royals had over £150 billion in disposable assets offshore; they would never ever need. Corbin ended the program by reminding viewers.
'The Queen can not be blamed for illegal insider-dealings in government arms contracts and Civil List thefts perpetrated by her forefather's. But she did inherit that same stolen fortune, at least two billion held in offshore banks. And many more billions in land and property. Since 1952, the Queen has used that money to make many more billions. Most MP's, and no doubt many members of the public, want those billions returned to the British Treasury without delay. And there is also the little matter of illegally avoiding tax for forty years. In another special program tomorrow night Panorama will be asking an invited studio audience. Is it time for a Republic?'

 ____

  Snowdonia

Prince Charles had given half-a-million to a fund for struggling farmers. The morning after Panorama, a "royal reporter" visiting one of the tens of thousands of farms in line for a few royal pence, had a bucket of warm pig shit thrown in her face.

The farmers daughter, a lovely Welsh girl with a matching accent, had videoed the event. Sky TV snapped-up the video. Speaking to a young male Sky reporter, the farmer's daughter said. 'It's disgraceful. That's what it is. Bloody disgraceful. Using bankrupt farmers as a fucking photo-opportunity. The pittance he gave to the farmer's fund works out at a few hour's interest on the billions he's got in the fucking bank. Bloody fucking hypocrite. Who could believe he cares about us when he takes millions from hospitals to pay that dirty old scrubber he sleeps with. Do you know that fucking ugly old scrubber owns two dozen race horses?'
Trying not to laugh, the reporter nodded. The girl rattled on. 'Did she get them on the health service? Thieving bloody-fucking-bastards. Someone should shoot the fucking lot of them.'
Stifling a laugh the reporter asked her father. 'Did you plan to use a bucket of pig muck?'

'Well we heard he was in the area see. Then one of his runners turned-up in the yard in a red designer twin-set. Well we thought she'd look better dressed in shite. Seeing as how she gets paid for talking shite.'

Cracking-up with laughter, the reporter managed to inquire.  'Do your neighbour's feel the same way. About the royals?'
The daughter answered. 'Of course they do. Everything's on the internet now. Everyone can see what bloody-fucking-thieving-fucking-useless-swine's they are.'

Prince Charles has two Media Monitors embedded in the armed guard who shadow his movements 24/7. As soon as  the farmers daughter was aired on Sky News the monitors told Charles his farm photo-shoot was over. As the entourage sped back to London Charles needed a large malt from the Daimler's cocktail bar. He was thinking of the one thing British subjects will never find on the internet - the royals escape plan. The main escape plane lives in a heated hanger at RAF Lossiemouth. Delivered in 1986, as a present from President Regan, the short 747 has only logged 4,000 hours flying time, everything inside still looks brand new. In the event of a Revolution (which will follow a nuclear accident or attack as sure as night follows day) Two-dozen long range US helicopters, on permanent stand-by around Britain, will fly the royals and Her Majesty's
Cabinet Ministers to the 747. Or if the fall-out is too heavy inland, the helicopters will land on US aircraft carrier's in the Bay of Biscay or the Icelandic sea - depending which way the wind is taking the fall-out. Dim-witted Charles was finally beginning to realize the plan depended on the consent of mummy's hitherto arse-kissing cabinet ministers. If the peasants got really ugly Charles and his scrubber would not get out alive.

 ____

Sandringham Sporting Estate

Royally ignoring nationwide calls for a Republic the royals had ordered their servants to pack the usual baggage trains that accompany the family to Sandringham where they celebrate the birth of Jesus by blasting little birds out of the Norfolk sky. The usual squads of armed plain-clothes SAS troopers guarding Sandringham, (9 miles long, 5 miles wide)  were trebled to cope with increased public and media attention.
Norfolk Sabs organised a group of unusual flying-pickets.
The Queen was surprised to see well-dressed families in Range Rover's and Cherokee SE's awaiting her arrival at the Sandringham gates.
A line of ten winter-clad smiling children unrolled their greetings. 
Happy. Christmas. Queeny. Don't. Get. Shot. They. Wring. Your. Neck.

Princess Anne's pitt-bulls killing another one of mummy's flock of corgi's and chewing on a couple of mummy's 700 palace flunky's opened the annual Sandringham slaughter in the time honoured way so beloved of the Sun newspaper. Rebekah Wade editorialised:
'Through the telephotos, German cousins are noticeable by their absence this year. The Queen is as repulsively absorbed in killing innocent creatures as she was as an obscenely privileged child. Her shooting party's are as brainless and bloody pointless as ever. Her Majesty's
Government take £2 bn per year off the taxpayer to protect the German royals and their foreign visitors. The Sun say's that £2 bn should go the police. Why should taxpayer's wait twenty minutes for a 999 call to be answered while palace pampered parasites waste the taxpayers money by the billion surrounded by soldiers and policemen who could be doing something useful?'  'Should Billionaire Parasites Pay Their Own Bills? Call The Sun Opinion Poll Now.' 
 The following day half-a-dozen hired coach's full of smiling oldies from London pubs circled the perimeter of the estate. One of the oldies told BBC News.  'We are hoping to see the royal parasites being kicked-out.'

 Kath & Jack Campbell had followed the growing calls to end the monarchy in the French press. On the last day of their tour Foxy Lady graced the front page of Le Monde. The "lady" had left her ring-fenced villa in Montego Bay to announce she was selling her 'sexy, sexy life story' to Fox TV. She had accepted $M10 to front ten sensational programs on the 'Private Life Of The phony Royals.'  At a Hollywood press call in Fox TV studios she stated. 'Nothing Hollywood has visualized comes near the truth about this family. What they did to the innocent Diana is only the tip of the iceberg. During the 1930's Depression, while millions of unemployed British subjects were literally left to rot in disgusting crumbling slums, the so-called Windsor family never altered their routine of excessive royal gluttony. As a young man, my father filmed the royal mob hunting, shooting and fornicating in drug and drink fuelled orgies. His films will feature in all ten of my upcoming programs.' 
  
Returning to a sleet and snow covered England the Campbell's were somewhat surprised to learn their eldest, by five minutes, Julie, was a founder member of The Den, and 'young Millie' was about to embark on a highly criminal sabotage-mission. They knew the girls could look after themselves but Kath was worried about Millie going undercover. She insisted on driving her to the hotel. On the way Kath tried to talk her out of the idea but she was wasting her breath.

 ____

The Sholtren Hotel

The youngest on the crew Millie found spying remarkably easy. Most of the regulars seemed surprisingly indifferent to the hunt. Chatting with Rita the Housekeeper she learned the last Countess, a Bostonian, had told the Seventh Earl 'If you buy me a yacht I will marry you.' He did and she did. The Countess had no time for blood sports. Her children, Thelma and Don, were encouraged to sail - not hunt. They were away at school when their parents were lost at sea. American cousins ran the estate until Don was 18.
Talking to Brigadier Tandy, Millie got the impression the old boy couldn't harm a fly. He was rather enjoying his Mr Bloody image. He told her the Sholtren Hunt had more than halved in number over the last decade. Millie found those who remained were as sad as they come. Never in her wildest dreams had Millie seen herself serving the stirrup cup to mounted loonies on a clear and crispy morning. But here she was, a week into the job, outside the hotel blending into the Christmas card scene like Tiny Tim's sister. Eat your heart out Mata Hari, thought Millie. She counted twenty-four hunters as they trotted-off for the Sholtren estate, she remembered Julie's boyfriend saying, 'their eyes light up in the saddle.' She made a mental note to tell him. That wasn't childish glee. It was pure bloody evil. That night she set the alarm for 5 am. It was freezing as she crawled out from under the duvet. Wearing her pyjamas and bathrobe, anyone would think she was going to the loo. She hid the floppy containing the bug in her pants. If anyone saw her in the office, she would say she was checking her e-mail. An unlikely excuse at that time in the morning but the best she could think of. Silently she opened her door. No one was about. She moved quickly down the creaking staircase. Trying to act natural, she entered the office and sat down at the desk. She pushed the floppy in the Dell and began copying it to the hard disk Engrossed in espionage she didn't hear the feet approaching from the kitchen. A warm wet tongue slithered across her cold right ankle.  'Jezzsus.' She yelled, as she jumped out of her skin. 'Sidney. You. You little bugger. I'll kill you.' Sidney ignored her shaking fist. Sidney had a thing about feet. The disk finished copying. Quickly, she put it back in her pants, picked up the pup and crept up the stone floor passage to the kitchen. She put Sidney in his basket then stole back upstairs. Using her nail scissors she prized open the floppy, took out the disk and cut it into bits. She reset the alarm then got back under the duvet.  At 10 am she went for a jog as usual. Most of yesterday's snow remained frozen crisp. The sky was promising more. The hotel and the gatehouse of the Sholtren estate were the only two buildings on this stretch of the old coast road. Gangs of squawking seagulls were scavenging the misty fields. The sharp sea air smelt wonderful. Jogging in town could never compare to this. Three mile up the road she passed the lane leading down to Tandy's farm. She usually turned back at this point but she kept going for another mile. She stopped for a breather on a small bridge over the drainage channel. Leaning over the bridge, she dropped the bits of the floppy into the muddy stream flowing down to the sea. She then sent a coded text message to Murphy. She didn't feel good destroying the hotel computer. Nevertheless. For the sake of Reynard, who could not help himself. It had to be done. Mike Fletcher had no such doubts when he planted the bug at the Wiltshire hunt stables where he was working the holiday. To complete the illusion that a system-killer was lurking around the internet, Murphy then hacked into a few relevant sites and left a graphic warning. Everyone who screened up Countryside Alliance and Horse & Hounds was greeted by a huntsman hanging from a tree and a message in dripping blood.

Toby Jugs: Time is Up - The Happy Fox.

1: 30 pm. Rita the housekeeper was doing the hotel accounts when the screen went blank. She called Dell who sent a local engineer. After much head scratching the engineer left a replacement system. Back at the workshop it was agreed this was no ordinary bug. The workshop manager posted a 'fatal' warning on the engineer's web.  
1: 50 pm. The head lad was online when the system died on him. By 5: 40 pm, engineers in Norfolk had compared the Sholtren Hotel bug with the one from the Wiltshire hunt stables. At 6 pm, the media began warning everyone connected to foxhunting, stables, kennels, pubs shops ect., to stay off-line until further notice. Every Toby Jug in the country disconnected from the net. On News at Ten. A bellicose spokesman from the Royal Beaufort stated. 'These dammed computer hackers are spoiling everyone's Christmas. Brown should pull out all the stops and use MI5 to catch these criminals.' Downing Street had no comment. News At Ten asked the redoubtable Miss Widdecombe.

'Do you think the Prime Minister will use MI5 to track down the hackers?'

'I believe Gordon Brown will think MI5 have far better things to do. Mr Brown knows the public have no patience with cowards who chose cruelty to animals as a pastime.  Foxhunters are no more than happy-slapping hoodies on horseback. The will get no help from Gordon Brown.'

Enjoying a bottle of Black Label with his feet up Gordon Brown had a good laugh at News at Ten.
The editor of the Mirror had warned him to expect an entirely different story. The 'Cayman Nominee' returned to top-story in the middle of Newsnight. Such was the sensational new evidence the program was extended and ran through the night. Mrs. Rabyaah Patel (35) mother of model Moona (17) was quoted.

 'As soon as we found the documents we could see tens of billions were involved. We immediately rang Downing Street and tried to speak to Gordon Brown. One of his condescending underlings eventually said the best he do was to arrange for us to have afternoon tea with the British Governor where we could hand over the evidence. Can you imagine? He thought he could buy us off with unsolicited cake!'

 The next day every front page in Europe and the US had the shapely Patel's on the beach in their itsy-bitsy bikinis. The Patel's had sold the Mirror copies of four Grand Cayman Barclay accounts in the names of four ex-cabinet ministers. Dated 1988-89, the accounts had received monthly infusions of $100,000 from the Tory stronghold Belize. Mrs. Patel claimed to have found two of her late husband's old briefcase's full of photocopies of similar Barclay, Rothschilds and Credit Swiss statements. She had placed 129 statements, in as many names, with her lawyers. She claimed to have statements in the names of. 'All the leading Tories and more royals than we knew existed.'

The delightful Moona told the Mirror. 'All Heads of State use their puppets to loot their own Treasuries. The Cayman's also handle politicians kickbacks from the poppy cartels.'

The Mirror reminded readers: 'In 1979, when Thatcher took office. Britain had 650,000 unemployed. Despite Gods Gift of the oil money coming-in by 1986 the total was over 4,000,000!  Queen Lizzy's designer (Divide and Rule) dole queue's disguised the theft of the oil money and provided the poppy cartels with a ready made army of drug pushers. Youngster's could queue-up for £20 per-week on the dole or earn £500 per-week pushing dope. Drug abuse in the horrendous Thatcher years increased twenty-fold. From Lizzy's point of view; it is far better to have young people stoned out of their minds than have them thinking what her ministers are doing with public money. If you thought dole queues were made in haven. Think Again. Unemployment is the oldest tool of the filthy-rich. And Lizard Lizzy is obscenely rich.' 

Only two weeks earlier the Tory press had sneered at Moona Patel's allegations calling them 'a photo opportunity for herself.'  Finding the photocopies contributed to a fitting end the Tory Party. The Patel's revealed but a fraction of the evidence Brigadier Tandy had brought home from fourteen tax-havens. Tandy had been concentrating on the ultra-exclusive BoEN (Bank of England Nominees also known as Ben) set-up in 1977 for the Queen, Saddam Hussein, the Sultan of Dubai, the Sultan of Oman, the Saudi royals, the Kuwaiti royals et al. Since 1977 Lizzy had used Ben to enrich her family by a few billion every year from public money paid into bogus nuclear outfits. All cosily covered by Her Majesty's
Secret Act.

 ____

A New Country

   Gordon Brown's brief statement on BBC 11 am News began the Republic. 

 'In 1988 the US Justice Department complained to Margaret Thatcher about British banks laundering illegal drug profits on the Caribbean islands. The complaint was ignored. Not only did the Thatcher cabinet  allow British banks to carry on accepting anyone's money - without question, Margaret Thatcher sent a team of Whitehall civil servants to several remote islands in the Pacific and Indian ocean's to teach locally owned banks how to become tax-havens, where criminals could hide their illegal gains. Since 1998, I have been collecting evidence of Margaret Thatcher's and John Major's fraudulent accounting, countersigned by the former Queen. Between 1979 and 1997 billions of the taxpayers money was stolen through government contracts. The money was wired from Whitehall to bogus nuclear research foundations in places as far apart as Geneva and Jakarta. Most of the stolen money, I need hardly say, has disappeared completely, after arriving at the new banks created by Margaret Thatcher in 1988. With the help of the US Treasury Department, the authority's in Bermuda have been able to freeze some of the stolen money. The former royal family are now being escorted to Bermuda, where they will face trial for illegally banking ten billion pounds, stolen from the British Treasury between 1982 and 1993. As a temporary measure, until a new government is elected, the military will be assisting the police in their day-to-day business. Also, as a temporary measure, while we put our own house in order. We will have to suspend all immigration to Britain. Immigration to Britain will cease as from midnight to-morrow night. Parliament is at this moment debating the introduction of  the new government. All British television channels are now broadcasting the debate in full. I'll hand you over now to the House of Commons.'

 ____

RAF Lossiemouth

An hour before Brown's BBC announcement the royals had been told a serious incident at Sellafield made it necessary to evacuate the entire family. They were far too busy shouting instructions to their servants to notice the helicopters landing in their gardens were not American but British Army. They woke up to the fact as the arrest warrants were served. The Queen and forty-six members of her family were no strangers to the dark grey Jumbo waiting on the runway. The same one they had used in their annual rehearsal to abandon Britain in the event of a nuclear accident or attack since 1986. Seated in the Kevlon reinforced windowless VIP section the party felt much safer than when they were arrested at their various address's. Presented with the evidence they had envisaged a swift execution for Treason. The ex-royals breathed a collective sigh of relief as the 747 took-off.

Thatcher and two dozen similar puppets had been arrested at the same time. They would be flown to Bermuda later. To cut down legal costs and reduce media coverage, Tandy persuaded Brown to gave most senior Tories 24-hours to leave the country or face charges. Ann Widdecombe sat alone on the opposition front bench. The English speaking world tuned into BBC 24 at 5 pm to watch Gordon Brown's two hour speech, explaining how £290 bn was stolen from the taxpayer via fictitious nuclear arms and research contracts concocted by the Queen's nominee's in secret meetings at closely guarded 'grace and favour' properties and place's like Castle Mey and the phony Kent's pile in Gloucestershire.

While Brown's "Operation Z" was in the planning stage Tandy had advised him to wheel-out an unknown official from some Whitehall cubby-hole to announce the 747 had disappeared in the Bermuda Triangle.
Brown had found a harmless alcoholic, due for early retirement from the Ministry of Transport. Also following Tandy's sound advice Brown did a quick deal with Fox TV to make sure no-one grieved over the missing monarchy. Minutes after all TV channels carried the sad-eyed official announcing the Jumbo's 'inexplicable disappearance.'  All TV and radio channels began plugging the first of Foxy Lady's ten Porno à la Royal films. 'Now available at HMV and Amazon.com.'  Two generations of the horse-faced phony Windsor family, stark naked, taking turns each at pallid pageboys and childlike chambermaids in various Palaces, royal woods, hunt lodges, royal yachts & trains silenced those who thought Britain ever needed so-called "royals." 

A few months later the job of cutting school and hospital ribbons and unveiling plaques had passed smoothly to smiling eight and nine-year-olds who would actually remember and take a genuine interest in the new buildings they were opening. The word President now replaced the word Queen but not many noticed. President Brown ordered the closure of all nuclear waste stations and the compulsory building of safe-cheap-energy-systems. Biogas power stations, Offshore Wind Farms and Rock Lagoons previous blocked by the oil, natural gas and nuclear-vested Queen were now under construction. Farmers from Caithness to Cornwall were planting fast growing poplar trees and miscanthus grass, by the square mile, for the new biogas power stations. Solar panels were mandatory on all new buildings. Britain's power bill would soon be reduced by half.
 
Many things 'royal' remained remarkably the same. Henry 5th and Princess Diana dominated postage stamps. The Royal Navy & Airforce carried-on as normal. In the mess they toasted the President with the same enthusiasm, or lack of, they once toasted the Queen. Portraits in Public Buildings of Lizzy & Co., were replaced with decent people. Diana, Barbara Castle, Emily Davison, Florence Nightingale, Winston Churchill,  Bernard Montgomery ect, ect, ect..  British banknotes carried the same portraits.

The moronic royal "sport" of "hunting" the uneatable fox was ended by banning perverts keeping packs of attacks dogs. Most US foxhunts were closed down thanks to copy-cat versions of the Den Website using the internet to convey the idiocy of cruelty for cruelty's sake. Most French hunts continued - say la vie. Lizzy's cousin Dubya Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld and Rice were found shot dead. Nobody saw any reason to investigate the passing of such dross. As The Washington Post put it. "Shit Happens."

Tandy's EU Referendum revealed the extent of corruption and the whole rotten edifice was quickly dismantled. The death of the criminal EU gave birth to an honest understanding of cross-border trading agreements; none of which came with a smarmy army of thieving Tory merchant bankers, thieving Tory accountants and thieving Tory consultants. The Tory Party was over.  So-called EU Commissioners who had colluded with the aforesaid to rob the honest taxpayer were asset stripped and locked away for life to mean life. The British economy had never looked better as the rigged market collapsed. The Euro was being phased-out after Referendums in most former EU countries.
  All British armed services were being enlarged to take control of the drugs trade. President Brown had decided hard drugs like hard liqueur should be taxed. Hard drugs would be dispensed by specialist doctor's in 'Walk in Surgeries' under army control. The public would not learn of his plan until the Yardies et al had been taken out of the loop.

Eventually Afghanistan would grow rich as the world's purest poppy shop and a Mecca for tourists. London was the first city to feel the benefit when Armed Police Response Units were replaced by Permanent Army Area Units. Anyone carrying a gun died in a hail of none-plastic bullets.  While 'our boy's' cleaned the streets of drug gangs the Royal Institute lectured on as always. Royal Society's carried-on as normal with proper, academic, patrons.
At the Tower Of London, Beefeaters still told the gory history of England. Republic Week was a great success when it replaced Royal Ascot Week.
Few noticed the House of Lords had been abolished.
The guard would go on changing as ever outside Buckingham Palace, where a forty-foot-high white-marble Diana Spencer now attracted more tourists than the repulsive Lizzy, Chas & Clammy could have done in a billion years.

The mystery of 'The Phony Royals Last Flight' proved another permanent source of revenue for the British Treasury. All castles and palaces, including Buck House, with their secret underground shelters and escape tunnels were thrown open to the public. Tourists from all over the globe flocked to see how the phony royals had lived in complete safety during WW2. How they had feasted for hundreds of years on the sweat of the British workforce who they treated with utter contempt. For £25 tourists could buy a copy of the Top Secret escape plan, detailing  how the entire royal family would have been air lifted abroad within minutes of a British Nuclear accident. Leaving the taxpayer's to die of fall-out. For another £25 tourists could buy the ex Queen's Top Secret plan to turn Britain into an International Nuclear Waste & Biochemical Dump. 
Many believed the phony royals were alive and well. Living their usual life of unfettered greed on their collection of private Indonesian and Pacific islands. The belief was given credence when Lord Lucan died in Mozambique. His last request was an English grave (which was denied)  Worldwide sales of Foxy Lady's disgusting films were over-taken when Fox TV released Crowned Thieves. Alan Neville had written the script. Levin's gorgeous girlfriend, Tanya, presented the evidence confirming two centuries of unscrupulous insider arms-dealing, accompanied by systematic theft from the Civil List and the jewel rooms. Three hours long, Crowned Thieves, was destined to become the best selling video of the decade and the final word on the phony House of Windsor.

President Brown announced immigration would remain on hold until full employment for British people had been achieved. At the start of his decade as President he reintroduced Clause Four. Sharing the wealth of the country put the Great back into Britain. The British enjoyed the highest standards of health care public transport, education and law & order on the planet.

 ____

Just Deserts

It should not have taken long to realize their servants and the planes crew were not up-front, at their beck and call, as per usual. It's interesting to speculate who got the blame when they realized they were locked in the VIP compartment of a plane with no crew. They had nine hours to “discuss” before a ton of carefully distributed Semtex & C4 turned the 747 into goblets of molten metal.     

 The Happy Fox - Jim Hutchinson © 2002

 Repeats in the following pages,  i.e. The entire royal family have always been ready to abandon Britain within minutes of a nuclear 'event.' I have not edited-out repeats of this profoundly important fact because it is never seen in the forelock-tugging media - where the nuclear truth is drowned in never ending tits and football.  The media should not be concentrating on trivia when the Head Of State operates Targets of Mass Destruction for the sole purpose of making her odious family obscenely richer. Her pursuit of Oil and Arms profits has now created suicide squads living amongst us. Suicidal fanatics won't stop at trains and buses. Needless Targets Of Mass Destruction will remain on our soil as long as the phony royals are around.

Repulsive profiteers say we need more nuclear waste stations. Unless we stop them, these thugs will turn this green and pleasant land into a NO GO AREA.
This
link shows what these repulsive thugs produce nuclear waste for.
  

Page 14 Special Relationship  

 

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